S)"28 Apart from such external things, there is the daily pressure on me of concern for all the churches."
2 Corinthians 11:28 (NASB)
O) Paul is asserting the validity of his apostleship and in the previous verses, he describes the zillion and a half ways he's almost died for the gospel. He's been stoned, left for dead, ship-wrecked, and whipped. He's faced threats to his life from the wild and from men, from other Israelites and Gentiles. Yet, after listing all the myriad ways he's almost been ended, he says this line. He considers it equal to all of the external struggles he's faced, the burden he has for the success of the churches. I really think that it's because of the persistant longing in his heart, to see the Way doing well in the hearts of the people, that he was even able to endure so much. Yet, it still felt like a burden to him, at least at times. Enough so, that he uses his heartache as a cap to his laundry list of struggles.
A) Being on staff for a few years and getting close to my head pastor, I've heard him talk a lot about his experience as a minister. I've never heard my pastor talk about struggling financially, although I know he has. I've never heard him talk about dealing with prejudice and persecution, although I know he has. Fortunately, we live in America, so he hasn't had to face much by way of natural threats, but I don't imagine he'd mention that either. Because the hardest part of ministry, by far and away, is the way that the people you lead, protect, counsel, and love, can break your heart. I consider it a blessing to minister to anyone, but the more intimate the ministry, the more risk there is that the person will make decisions that will crush me. Like Paul's example, though, it's that very concern for the well-being of those love that keeps me moving forward in ministry. So, when my concern for others feels the most like a burden, I need to recognize it as a blessing that will keep me rooted in God, and keep me going despite any other external struggle that can come my way.
P) Father, thank You for calling me into ministry. I know that that will look different over the years, as it's already started to change, but I know that there's no other place I'd rather be, than sharing Your grace, mercy, healing, restoration, reconcilation, and love. You are too good to miss. It's hard sometimes though, Lord. Holy Spirit, I pray that You would strengthen me and comfort me when I feel like ministry is futile or when I see that some one is abandoning what they know is right, despite my best efforts to encourage them and lead them back to You. In Jesus' name, I pray. Amen.
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