S) "4 Then everyone who trembled at the words of the God of Israel on account of the unfaithfulness of the exiles gathered to me, and I sat appalled until the evening offering. 5 But at the evening offering I arose from my humiliation, even with my garment and my robe torn, and I fell on my knees and stretched out my hands to the Lord my God; 6 and I said, 'O my God, I am ashamed and embarrassed to lift up my face to You, my God, for our iniquities have risen above our heads and our guilt has grown even to the heavens.'"
Ezra 9:4-6 (NASB)
O) The sin in question, was the intermarriage of Israelites and gentiles. This was a problem, specifically because when it happened, historically, it brought the Israelite into spiritual adultery against the LORD. Men would follow the false gods of their gentile wives, and so would the women follow the gods of their gentile husbands. This infidelity was exactly what led to their eventual exile. So, for Ezra to realize that this intermarrying was still happening, even among the remnant who was supposed to remain faithful during the exile, was tantamount to catastrophe. But, Ezra did not wallow in despair. As much as it seemed to shock him, he still took action, waiting for the evening sacrifice to make his confession and appeal to the God.
A) Every single time I sin, in any capacity, that is the same as spiritual infidelity to the LORD. Whether that can be seen as idolizing some material thing (like money or entertainment), or a concept (like family or even church), or even elevating my own self above God (by thought or action), virtually every sin will fall under one of those categories. As such, my response to my own sinful behaviors should tell me a lot about how I view sin. I should be carefully considering, "Am I heartbroken about this?" While I may not literally rip my clothes or hair out, am I grieved? This is not a matter of public shaming, or anything along those lines. However, I should be thoroughly humbled every time my need for grace and mercy is made evident again. The truth is, I need the atoning blood of Jesus Christ in my life pretty much every single day. Thankfully, His sacrifice is eternally sufficient. Thankfully, each day that I need forgiveness is just like the first, in that God loved me even in my sins, and was willing that His Son should take my punishment instead. That lovingkindness, that compassion, is what draws me to repentance each time I sin. I don't have to wait for the evening sacrifice, to make my confession and appeal for mercy. The sacrifice of Jesus Christ is perpetually sufficient. So, when I sin, in my shame and humility, I should immediately rend my heart, kneeling my spirit before the LORD my God, declaring my shame and, frankly, embarrassment about my sin again. At the end, I remember that I approach the throne of grace with confidence, because I am forgiven, and the Holy Spirit is still at work in me. God knows that sanctification is in process, until the work of the gospel is completed in me at the final resurrection.
P) Father, Your holiness and perfection makes me soberly aware of my sins. I am embarrassed by my mistakes. I am ashamed in my guilt. But, I remember that You are not surprised by my sins. You knew ahead of time, each and every instance in which I would need mercy. You knew, in Your perfect foreknowledge, that I would need the blood of Jesus to wash me clean. That was true from the start, and it is true today, and it will be true until the day I am finished on earth and I am united in perfected glory with Christ in heaven. Father God, it is still my desire, that every time I sin, I am heartbroken. Discipline me however it takes, that I may be more and more obedient to Your will. May it never be, that I am ever indifferent to sin. Help me to have a disgusted view of my own sin, that my disobedience would be abhorrent to me. Let me remember the perfect grace and mercy, given to me in Christ, that I would always be comforted to lift my face to You, Lord. You are both my Judge and my Salvation. Be glorified in my need for You. In Jesus's name I pray. Amen.
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